


The Chat of Betrayal

by DeadpanMage



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Everyone is really sassy, Gen, Group chat, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-10
Updated: 2016-07-14
Packaged: 2018-06-01 12:08:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6518707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeadpanMage/pseuds/DeadpanMage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Another Hamilton group chat fic because why not</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. BETRAYAL

**Author's Note:**

> Usernames:  
> Alexander: Hamsome  
> John: #FeelTheBern  
> Lafayette: America's Favorite Fighting French Queer  
> Hercules: Not a horse fucker  
> Angelica: Angel Among Us  
> Eliza: Cinnamon rolls not gender roles  
> Peggy: Agent Schuyler

Agent Schuyler: Are we actually doing this

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Yes!!!! It will be fun!!!! All of our friends in one chat

Agent Schuyler: Idk about you but I have way more friends than this

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: *mutual friends

Angel Among Us: We're not going to change her mind Peggy

Agent Schuyler: Ok fine

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Yay!!!!!!!!!

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Hamsome to the chat

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Hi Alex!!

Hamsome: Ladies ;) ;) ;)

Agent Schuyler: STOP

Angel Among Us: I feel violated just having read that

Hamsome: When will you return my love, Miss Schuyler?

Angel Among Us: No

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added #FeelTheBern to the chat

Agent Schuyler: I hope you're not talking to me you know I am literally The Gayest

#FeelTheBern: I object

Hamsome: At least Eliza still loves me

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: <3

Hamsome: <3

#FeelTheBern: What is this

#FeelTheBern: What sort of BETRAYAL have I walked in on

Hamsome: Oh no

Hamsome: John my love I am sorry

Hamsome: She meant nothing to me

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Um excuse me

Hamsome: (shhhhh I'm being smooth)

Angel Among Us: You're never smooth

#FeelTheBern: Since when

Agent Schuyler: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH

#FeelTheBern: *high fives Angelica*

Hamsome: I'M BEING BETRAYED BY MY LOVED ONES

Angel Among Us: *High fives*

#FeelTheBern: That's what you get

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added America's Favorite Fighting French Queer to the chat

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Hello

Hamsome: It's me

Agent Schuyler: It's me

Agent Schuyler: Dammit Alex

Hamsome: ;)

#FeelTheBern: Good The Queer has arrived

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Damn right

Hamsome: John I know what you were going for but it looks like you called Laf "Good The Queer"

Agent Schuyler: That's my band name

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: It's true I play drums

Agent Schuyler: No you can't be in it you're A Straight

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Betrayed by my own sister

Hamsome: This chat is full of betrayal

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to "The chat of Betrayal"

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Not a horse fucker to the chat

Hamsome: Perfect

Hamsome: Also hello Hercules

Not a horse fucker: Hey

Not a horse fucker: Do I even want to know why the chat is called that

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Peggy betrayed me

Not a horse fucker: Peg how could u

Agent Schuyler: It's not my fault she's a heterosexual

#FeelTheBern: Um we are forgetting the REAL betrayal here

Hamsome: No

#FeelTheBern: I caught Alex and Eliza FRATERNIZING

Hamsome: IT WAS A HEART EMOJI

Not a horse fucker: Wait what

Not a horse fucker: Oh

Hamsome: Yeah

Not a horse fucker: Alex how could u

Agent Schuyler: XD

Hamsome: THIS IS WHY THIS IS THE CHAT OF BETRAYAL

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Is there anyone else I should invite?

Angel Among Us: I think we're good

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Thomas maybe??

Hamsome: NO

#FeelTheBern: NO

Angel Among Us: FUCK NO

Not a horse fucker: NO

Agent Schuyler: NOPE NOT HAPPENING

Hamsome: No offense Laf but you are the only person on earth who doesn't hate Thomas Jefferson

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Untrue

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: James likes him

Hamsome: You are the only person not sleeping with Jefferson who doesn't hate him

Angel Among Us: Remind me why you're friends with him he's a dick

Angel Among Us: No offense

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: He's not that bad

Agent Schuyler: Laf he hit on me

Agent Schuyler: I'M A LESBIAN

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: …

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Anyway

Not a horse fucker: You just like having a France buddy

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: ANYWAY

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: We were talking about Alex betraying John

Hamsome: OH MY GOD

#FeelTheBern: I'm still so hurt Alex

Hamsome: I swear to god I will leave this chat

Angel Among Us: You can't run from your shame Alexander

Hamsome: I AM SERIOUS

Not a horse fucker: No ones stopping you man

Hamsome: Okay goodbye fuckers

Hamsome has left the chat

Angel Among Us: Finally we are free

Agent Schuyler: "Okay goodbye fuckers" he has such a way with words

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: XD

Agent Schuyler: Quick let's talk shit about him while he's gone

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Your Fave is Problematic: Alexander Hamilton

Agent Schuyler: Omfg

Angel Among Us: 1. He thinks he's my fave when he's not

#FeelTheBern: 2. Has the most fucked up sleep schedule

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: 3. True I had to literally drag him to bed once

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: 4. I'm pretty sure my contact name in his phone is still "large baguette"

 

#FeelTheBern: 5. It is

Not a horse fucker: 6. Doesn't cry during Disney movies

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Omg

Not a horse fucker: Like who hurt this man

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Guys Alex just messaged me asking to be put back in the chat

Agent Schuyler: Omg

Angel Among Us: DON'T DO IT

Angel Among Us: Let him pay for his crimes

#FeelTheBern: Let him back in, Eliza

Angel Among Us: But John

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Hamsome to the chat

Angel Among Us: He has besmirched your honor

Hamsome: I HAVE BESMIRCHED NOTHING

Agent Schuyler: Sure Jan

Not a horse fucker: I like how he automatically knows we're talking about him

Not a horse fucker: Like we could've been talking about Aaron Burr for all you know

Hamsome: Burr would have to actively do something to besmirch someone's honor

Agent Schuyler: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Angel Among Us: Get wrecked Burr

#FeelTheBern: *applause*

Agent Schuyler: Angie no it's "get rekt"

Agent Schuyler: It's not funny if you spell it right

Angel Among Us: Poor spelling isn't funny Peggy

Agent Schuyler: Okay mom

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: XD

Angel Among Us: Now you listen here young lady

Hamsome: Angelica confirmed to be mom friend

Not a horse fucker: Excuse you I am the mom friend

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: What does that make me???

Not a horse fucker: My wife

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Oh smooth

Hamsome: Hercules and Eliza confirmed to be old lesbian couple

Angel Among Us: Oh my god

Agent Schuyler: As a lesbian this personally offends me

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Sorry Peggy :(

Agent Schuyler: I am yet another victim in the chat of betrayal

Agent Schuyler: …You are forgiven

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: :)

Agent Schuyler: :)

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: :)

Angel Among Us: :)

Hamsome: :)

Agent Schuyler: STOP

#FeelTheBern: :)

Not a horse fucker: :)

Agent Schuyler: WHY

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: I'M SORRY PEGGY I WANTED TO BE INCLUDED IN THE MOMENT

Agent Schuyler: Aw Laf

Agent Schuyler: You can always be in the moment

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: :)

Hamsome: :)

Agent Schuyler: The rest of you fuckers– ALEX I STG

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: XD

Hamsome: Love you Peggy

Agent Schuyler: Fuck offfff

Hamsome: :)


	2. ONE OF US

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usernames:  
> Alexander: Hamsome  
> John: #FeelTheBern  
> Lafayette: America's Favorite Fighting French Queer  
> Hercules: Not a horse fucker  
> Angelica: Angel Among Us  
> Eliza: Cinnamon rolls not gender roles  
> Peggy: Agent Schuyler
> 
> Warning: chapter contains minor mentions of racism

#FeelTheBern: Petition for me to physically fight Charles Lee

Hamsome: Signed

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Signed

Not a horse fucker: Signed

Angel Among Us: What happened this time?

#FeelTheBern: SO THIS MOTHERFUCKER

Agent Schuyler: Here it comes

#FeelTheBern: HE SAYS THAT DONALD DRUMPF HAS "THE RIGHT IDEA" ABOUT IMMIGRATION LAWS

Angel Among Us: FIGHT HIM

Hamsome: KILL HIM

Angel Among Us: Alexander

Hamsome: Angelica

Angel Among Us: Alexander.

Hamsome: Angelica.

Agent Schuyler: and Peggy

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: XD

#FeelTheBern: So what I'm hearing is I should fight him

Hamsome: Yes

Angel Among Us: Intellectually. With words

Hamsome: And your fists

Angel Among Us: Alexander

Hamsome: Angelica

Not a horse fucker: Hercules

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Eliza

#FeelTheBern: John

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Marie Joseph Paul Yves  
Roch Gilbert du Motier

Agent Schuyler: …and Peggy

Hamsome: Oh my god

Angel Among Us: Laf why

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Feel my pain

Angel Among Us: OKAY SO YOU WANNA TALK NAME PAIN

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Oh no

Angel Among Us: WHEN I WAS IN THE 3RD GRADE

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Oh god I know this story

Angel Among Us: MY TEACHER KEPT TRYING TO PRONOUNCE MY NAME AS "ANGEL-IQUA"

Hamsome: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK

Angel Among Us: FUCKING GRAY ASS WHITE LADY

#FeelTheBern: Okay I'm fighting her instead

Angel Among Us: EVERY DAY I WOULD CORRECT HER

Angel Among Us: UNTIL ONE DAY

Agent Schuyler: I love this part

Angel Among Us: I looked her dead in the eye and said "I know you wouldn't call any of the little blonde girls   
Angel-iqua. You actually listen to them."

#FeelTheBern: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Hamsome: GET FUCKING REKT

Angel Among Us: Of course I could roast her way better now but I was like 9

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: And afterwards the school made sure Peggy and I weren't in her class

Hamsome: Oh my god

Agent Schuyler: Hey Angie remember when I was in 7th grade and everyone thought I was Hispanic bc my name is Margarita and you threatened to skip school so you could fight the principal

Angel Among Us: Indeed I do

#FeelTheBern: Omg

#FeelTheBern: Alex

Hamsome: Yeah?

#FeelTheBern: Angelica is one of us

Hamsome: OH MY GOD

Angel Among Us: NOOOOOOOOOOOO

Hamsome: ONE OF US

#FeelTheBern: ONE OF US

Hamsome: ONE OF US

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: ONE OF US

Not a horse fucker: ONE OF US

Agent Schuyler: ONE OF US

Angel Among Us: Peggy sit tf down you do not fight people

Agent Schuyler: I AM SMALL AND FULL OF RAGE

Hamsome: Welcome to the club, Sister Peggy

Angel Among Us: STOP THIS

Agent Schuyler: Thank you, Brother Alex

Agent Schuyler: ONE OF US

Hamsome: ONE OF US

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: ONE OF US

Angel Among Us: Eliza you are the least aggressive person I know don't fall for the peer pressure

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Alex can I be in your fight club

Hamsome: Of course, Sister Betsey <3

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Don't fucking call me Betsey <3

Agent Schuyler: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Not a horse fucker: S A V A G E

#FeelTheBern: ONE OF US

Agent Schuyler: ONE OF US

Hamsome: ONE OF US

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to "ONE OF US"

Angel Among Us: *SCREAMS*

Angel Among Us has left the chat

Agent Schuyler: Omfg

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Angel Among Us to the chat

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: THERE IS NO ESCAPE

Agent Schuyler: NO ESCAPE

Hamsome: NO ESCAPE

#FeelTheBern: NO ESCAPE

Angel Among Us: I HATE THIS

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: NO ESCAPE

Not a horse fucker: NO ESCAPE

Angel Among Us: FINE START A DAMN FIGHT CLUB I DON'T GIVE A SHIT

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to "Fight Club"

Angel Among Us has left the chat

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Angel Among Us to the chat

Hamsome: Welcome back, Sister Angelica

Angel Among Us: Oh fuck off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't mean for both chapters to end with people telling Alex to fuck off but I ain't stopping now
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has responded to this fic, the first chapter has been sitting in my documents for a while now because I wasn't sure what to do next, but like the day after I posted it I started getting ideas. So again, thank you all! :)


	3. People Alex Has Slept With

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alexander: Hamsome  
> John: #FeelTheBern  
> Lafayette: America's Favorite Fighting French Queer  
> Hercules: Not a horse fucker  
> Angelica: Angel Among Us  
> Eliza: Cinnamon rolls not gender roles  
> Peggy: Agent Schuyler

Angel Among Us: Guys should I change my username to "Angel Among Men"

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: YES!!!

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Absolutely

Hamsome: That is far more accurate

Angel Among Men: It has been done

Not a horse fucker: Excellent

Agent Schuyler: GUYS

Agent Schuyler: GUYS I AM SO GAY

Angel Among Men: Sweetie we already know

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: XD

Agent Schuyler: OKAY BUT TODAY I'M EXTRA GAY

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: I'm going to need details who what and where

Agent Schuyler: So you know that bar where all the cool bands play

Hamsome: Yeah

Angel Among Men: Peggy what are you doing in a bar you are a toddler

Agent Schuyler: Well t- ANGELICA I AM 22 YEARS OLD

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: *aggressively plays Taylor Swift song*

Not a horse fucker: Relatable

Agent Schuyler: So anyway you know the cute bartender

Hamsome: All of the bartenders there are cute

Hamsome: Wait

Hamsome: Do you mean that one girl who's always wearing red lipstick

Agent Schuyler: YAS

Agent Schuyler: <3 Maria <3

Hamsome: Shit

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Oh my god

Agent Schuyler: What

#FeelTheBern: *How Could This Happen To Me plays softly in the distance*

Agent Schuyler: WHAT

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: So remember when Alex and I broke up

#FeelTheBern: And then like two weeks later we started dating

Angel Among Men: I still cannot believe

Hamsome: Shhhhhhh

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Well during that two weeks when he was being an angsty dweeb

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: He and Maria

Agent Schuyler: OH MY GOD

Agent Schuyler: ALEX IS THERE A WOMAN IN THIS CITY YOU HAVEN'T SLEPT WITH

Hamsome: Hey I resent that remark

Angel Among Men: *resemble

Hamsome: ELIZA CAN YOU CHANGE THE CHAT NAME BACK TO CHAT OF BETRAYAL

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to "People Alex Has Slept With"

Hamsome: *SCREAMS*

Not a horse fucker: UM

Agent Schuyler: YEAH EXCUSE ME

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Right sorry

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to "People Alex Has Slept With ft. Herc & Peggy"

Not a horse fucker: There you go

Hamsome: How about there you No™

Agent Schuyler: How about shut tf up you slept with my True Love™

Hamsome: IT WAS OVER A YEAR AGO

Agent Schuyler: Some wounds never heal

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Omg XD XD

Angel Among Men: Peggy imma let you finish but can we talk about how pure Eliza is still using "XD" un-ironically

Not a horse fucker: #Relatable

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Omg

Hamsome: And whenever she's excited she uses at least three exclamation points Eliza is freaking adorable

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Thank you oh my gosh

Hamsome: Petition to change chat name to "Eliza Appreciation Chat"

Angel Among Men: Signed

Agent Schuyler: Signed

Not a horse fucker: Signed

#FeelTheBern: Wait a minute

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Signed

#FeelTheBern: ALEX YOU JUST WANT US TO CHANGE THE CHAT NAME

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: You guys are t– OH MY GOD ALEX

Hamsome: NO

Hamsome: LIES

Agent Schuyler: DON'T CHANGE IT ELIZA

Hamsome: WHAT IS THIS S L A N D E R AGAINST ME

#FeelTheBern: YOU CAN'T HIDE FROM THE TRUTH

Angel Among Men: DON'T LET HIM WIN

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: how 'bout i do

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: anyway?

Agent Schuyler: YOU MEME LOVING FUCK

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to "Eliza Appreciation Chat"

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: All hail the queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any suggestions for a new username for John?


	4. Lafayette is a Cabbage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is REALLY LATE. I've honestly had this on my computer for a while but I wasn't super happy with it but now I think I've fixed it a bit. Plus I really wanted to get something out to you guys now that I'M ON SUMMER VACATION  
> Alexander: Hamsome  
> John: Raise a Glass to Turtles  
> Lafayette: America's Favorite Fighting French Queer  
> Hercules: Not a horse fucker  
> Angelica: Angel Among Men  
> Eliza: Cinnamon rolls not gender roles  
> Peggy: Agent Schuyler

Raise a Glass to Turtles: ALRIGHT WHICH ONE OF YOU MOTHERFUCKERS CHANGED MY USERNAME

Raise a Glass to Turtles: GUYS

Raise a Glass to Turtles: I CAN SEE MY MESSAGES ARE BEING READ

Hamsome: Shit

Raise a Glass to Turtles: ALEXANDER I SWEAR TO GOD

Hamsome: HEY I DIDN'T DO IT

Hamsome: I mean I did but

Raise a Glass to Turtles: *SCREAMS*

Hamsome: It wasn't my idea I'm just the one who actually changed it since I'm the only one who knows your  
phone password

Raise a Glass to Turtles: WHY

Hamsome: Because you told me what it was?

Raise a Glass to Turtles: NO WHY DID YOU CHANGE IT

Hamsome: What would you rather I gave Lafayette your password?

Raise a Glass to Turtles: I'D RATHER YOU DIDN'T MESS WITH MY PHONE AT ALL

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Wait

Raise a Glass to Turtles: So it was

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Lafayette's

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Idea

Hamsome: SHIT

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: GOD DAMN IT ALEX

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: XD

Angel Among Men: This is glorious

Agent Schuyler: I want this chat written on my tombstone

Not a horse fucker: John haven't you been meaning to change your username anyway

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: EXACTLY

Raise a Glass to Turtles: NOT TO RAISE A GLASS TO TURTLES

Not a horse fucker: Idk John I think it suits you

Raise a Glass to Turtles: WHAT D– okay first of all

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: XD

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Fuck all y'all I'm out

Raise a Glass to Turtles: has left the chat

Angel Among Men: Alex what have you done

Hamsome: FUCK OFF

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Raise a Glass to Turtles to the chat

Raise a Glass to Turtles has left the chat

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: John they're both sorry– omg

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Raise a Glass to Turtles to the chat

Raise a Glass to Turtles has left the chat

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: John– my god

Hamsome: Lafayette what have you done

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: …that's fair  
—  
From Hamsome -> To Raise a Glass to Turtles:

Hamsome: John please come back

Raise a Glass to Turtles: No

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Alex

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Oh my god

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Alex stop

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Raise a Glass to Turtles: If I say yes will you stop

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Please

Hamsome: Yes

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Fine

Hamsome: <3

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Oh fuck off  
Raise a Glass to Turtles: I need to do one thing first  
—  
Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Supergay™ to the chat

Supergay™: Guess who's back

Agent Schuyler: PFFT

Not a horse fucker: A FREAKING PLUS MY FRIEND

Supergay™: ;)

Supergay™: Eliza

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Yeah?

Raise a Glass to Turtles: Will you do me a favor and change the chat name to "Lafayette is a chou"

Hamsome: Oh my god

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: With pleasure

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to "Lafayette is a chou"

Agent Schuyler: #FrenchHumor

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: I want to be mad but I can't

Supergay™: ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to @girlofshadowsandstars for giving me the idea for John's new username!


	5. Team Alex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alexander: Hamsome  
> John: Supergay™  
> Lafayette: America's Favorite Fighting French Queer  
> Hercules: Not a horse fucker  
> Angelica: Angel Among Men  
> Eliza: Cinnamon rolls not gender roles  
> Peggy: Agent Schuyler

Supergay™: So hey anybody up for movie night tomorrow?

Hamsome: I AM INSULTED

Agent Schuyler: *grabs popcorn* what up

Hamsome: JOHN JUST CANCELLED OUR DATE

Angel Among Men: What did you do

Hamsome: MUST WE ALWAYS ASSUME I DID SOMETHING

Not a horse fucker: Well

Not a horse fucker: Statistically

Agent Schuyler: Herc dishing out low key burns in my aesthetic

Supergay™: Same

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Same

Angel Among Men: Same

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Same

Angel Among Men: Really though what did Alex do

Supergay™: Alexander Hamilton

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: This should be good

Supergay™: Writer

Supergay™: Revolutionary

Supergay™: Future political leader

Hamsome: Hey idea let's stop there

Supergay™: Sexts like straight white boy

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: TRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUE

Agent Schuyler: I’M DYING

Angel Among Men: OKAY BUT I AM NOT SURPRISED

Not a horse fucker: SAME

Hamsome: EXCUSE ALL OF YOU

Hamsome: HOW I TEXT MY BOYFRIEND IS MY BUSINESS

Supergay™: Who wants receipts

Agent Schuyler: ME

Angel Among Men: Yes

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Me

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: I can go the rest of my life without reading Alex’s SWB™ sexts thanks

Supergay™: “Haha hey”

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: HE’S GOTTEN WORSE

Supergay™: “So you’re home right?”

Agent Schuyler: This isn’t even good SWB™ sexting where are the typos

Hamsome: THIS IS BULLYING

Supergay™: “And what if I was there~”

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: JOHN YOU GOTTA KEEP THAT BOY IN CHECK HE’S GETTING WORSE BY THE DAY

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: What is “~”

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: I have never seen it used except in texting

Hamsome: “The tilde (~ , pronounced TILL-duh or TILL-dee and sometimes called a "twiddle" or a "squiggle") is a special character found on most keyboards and used in a wide range of IT-related applications, including mathematics, programming, file systems, directories and URL addressing.”

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: Oh

Agent Schuyler: Tag yourself I’m “twiddle”

Angel Among Men: I’m “TILL-duh”

Hamsome: I’m “special character”

Supergay™: I’m- OH MY GOD

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: I’m “wide range of IT-related applications”

Supergay™: ALEX IS DOING THAT THING WHERE HE DISTRACTS US FROM HOW AWFUL HE IS

Hamsome: R U D E

Angel Among Men: I swear the fact that he’s so good at that is the only reason Alex has friends

Hamsome: OKAY WOW

Hamsome: WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS HATRED

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: IDK you probably fucked up in a past life or something

Agent Schuyler: True

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Perhaps you cheated on a loving wife who did nothing wrong

Not a horse fucker: Or encouraged your son to go to a fight to the death

Agent Schuyler: Or maybe you were just kinda a dick

Supergay™: Maybe you /stole something/

Agent Schuyler: lol likes that’s worse than what we said

Supergay™: AN IMMIGRANT EMBEZZLING OUR GOVERNMENT FUNDS

Hamsome: That assumes I was also an immigrant in my past life

Hamsome: We don’t know that

Angel Among Men: We can make an educated guess

Hamsome: Maybe I was a red blooded ‘murican

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: I have never understood that phrase

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: All blood is red???

Agent Schuyler: Same Laf

Hamsome: That’s because you’re not a ‘MURICAN

Supergay™: ALEX NEITHER ARE YOU

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: changed the chat name to MURICANS ft. Laf and Alex

Agent Schuyler: Omg

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: The chat name had been the same for too long

Supergay™: 6.5/10, lame name, would still chat in

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: Hon I will take a 6.5/10 any day

Angel Among Men: Well now we know why she dated Alex

Agent Schuyler: 911

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: H O L Y. F U C K

Not a horse fucker: *SIRENS BLARING*

Agent Schuyler: I JUST WITNESSED A FUCKING MURDER

Hamsome: *sips tea* sweaty :)

Supergay™: I don't know who to side with my boyfriend or the one who's clearly going to win

Hamsome: Did you not blatantly flirt with me the very night you later introduced me to Eliza

Angel Among Men: I

Angel Among Men has left the chat

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: I can't believe

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Angel Among Men to the chat

Agent Schuyler: lol wow Angie that was weak

Agent Schuyler: I'm team Alex now

Angel Among Men: W H A T

Hamsome: Welcome, Sister Peggy

Angel Among Men: THIS DOES NOT ERASE THE THOUSANDS OF TIMES I'VE DESTROYED THIS MAN

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: And yet in our hour of need you forget

Angel Among Men: I DON'T NEED YOUR FREESTYLE SASS YOU LE MIS REJECT

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: *GASP*

Supergay™: Dear god

Not a horse fucker: Angie that is Too Far

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: We don't tolerate bullying in this chat, ma’am

Angel Among Men: Oh no Laf I'm sorry

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: TOO LITTLE TOO LATE, TRAITRE

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: ELIZA

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: LET HER EAT CAKE

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles removed Angel Among Men from the chat

Hamsome: And with that

Hamsome: The Master Plan has succeeded

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles: O M F G

Not a horse fucker: *APPLAUSE*

America's Favorite Fighting French Queer: PERFECTION

Agent Schuyler: I’M FUCKING D Y I NG

Supergay™: See it's moments like these that hold our relationship together

Supergay™: No matter what I can always count on you to be a petty little fuck

Hamsome: Awwww babe <3

Supergay™: <3

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles changed the chat name to Team Alex

Cinnamon rolls not gender roles added Angel Among Men to the chat

Angel Among Men: Yeah that's what I expected

Hamsome: ;)


End file.
